The Monday Tackle

September 26, 2016 By Fabian Odhiambo

The Monday Tackle

Now his team finally won a match of football against the Champions no less and you can imagine how difficult it has been trying to rein in on Maitha‘s excitement. In fact, had he had his way with the TDO admin’s account, this would have been The Late Sunday Tackle yesterday. Anyway who can begrudge him? It’s a tough season and you just never know when next you could have something to smile about.

  1. E=mc2

After the week from hell when we were all called footballing Einsteins by the worst manager in the history of football, Jose Mourinho stumbled on the Theory of Roonitivity stumbled upon by Lord Fergie, which states that you must drop Rooney if you can, and you’ll win matches. Sort of. Well, Captain Leader Legend Almost Top Goalscorer was relegated to the ball boy and the favoured Number 15 position behind the manager on the Old Trafford brick dugout. And United exploded in the kind of first half performance we last saw five years ago. Goals from New Captain Leader Legend Mike Smalldini, your 2nd favourite bearded Monday blogger, the Rash kid and the 90m dab and hairstyle enthusiast buried the defending champions. Most of the goals came from corners, because the Hitherto Undroppable One had been utterly rubbish in taking them, the ball moved around fast, there was balance in the Force and there was even an appearance by Bizarro Zlatan. All was good at Old Trafford, until the 83rd minute when the person with the heaviest first touch in football entered the fray.

  1. 20 years on when afar and asunder…

The last time there was a memorial to Arsene Wenger, it was his 1000th game. He was facing Chelsea, conceded 6 and had the black guy sent off for a handball by the other black guy. Now, twenty years in charge of the Arsenal, my Editor-in-Chief can’t wait for his departure, he faces Chelsea again, a sleeker meaner Chelsea, we were led to believe, were it not for Gary Cahill and ‘The Earth is covered by sea, land and N’golo Kante’ being turned inside out. Theo Walcott’s goal was of exceptional top top quality and overall Arsenal displayed little bit fantastic mental strength in not getting whooped by Chelsea. A blow for consistent consistency in their first win in 5 years? I believe yes. Antonio Conte will be a little bit low, we all thought he knew how to organize a defence.

  1. Hull walichoma multibet

Free market economics dictates that the market’s invisible hand will always find a way of correcting the imbalances and restore the market to its natural equilibrium. Odds-on favourites for relegation, Hull City powered by SportPesa, after powering their way to 7 points, have finally found their level following a crushing defeat in the hands of Kloppoball and Boring James Milner. But to be fair, their fixture list has been unkind. They have already played Manchester United, Arsenal and Liverpool. Their next opponents? Chelsea. Perhaps they do have a chance after all once they navigate these treacherous waters.

  1. Oh, Davey Moyes…

I never did like David Moyes. Sure, I supported him because Lord Fergie told us to; but he brought United down to his true level and left them mired there in a sorry state which is still being fixed. He went over to the sun and sand in San Sebastian and brought only doom and gloom. Now he’s at Sunderland…doing the same. Letting a 2 goal lead go is criminal, but I don’t know what to call letting a 2-goal lead and proceeding to lose. At home.

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